My Dating Philosophy

 

The Philosophy: The Two-Year Intentional Path

My dating philosophy is a straightforward, two-year path to marriage. I call it the Intentional Path.

• Year 1: The Foundation Year. You date with the explicit, shared goal of determining marriage compatibility. This year is for building a deep connection, learning about each other's values, and confirming you're a team.

• The 1-Year Mark: The Decision Point. If you are both confident you've found your life partner, you propose.

• Year 2: The Engagement Year. You spend the next year as fiancés, planning your wedding and preparing for your future together. You get married by the end of this second year.

It's a simple $1+1=2$ year plan: 1 year of dating + 1 year of engagement = marriage.

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How to Convince Others to Try It

Here’s how you can frame it to make it sound appealing and logical to others.

For the Person You're Dating:

When starting a new relationship, you can introduce this idea not as a demand, but as a statement of your own clarity and goals.

"I want to be upfront about what I'm looking for. I'm at a stage in my life where I'm dating to find a lifelong partner. For me, that means dating with purpose. My ideal path is to spend a year building a strong foundation with someone. If we're right for each other, I believe we'll know by then. From there, I'd want to get engaged and then marry within the next year.

Does that kind of clarity and timeline feel right to you?"

This approach is powerful because it's honest, confident, and frames the timeline as a shared goal rather than a rule you are imposing.

For Your Friends or Skeptics:

When explaining your philosophy, focus on the benefits that solve common dating frustrations.

1. It Eliminates Ambiguity and "The Gray Area."

"Think about how many people waste years in relationships stuck in the 'What are we?' phase. My approach gets rid of that completely. From the beginning, both people know the goal is to evaluate for marriage. There are no games, no confusion—just honesty and a shared purpose."

2. It Deeply Respects Everyone's Time.

"Your time is the most valuable thing you have. I'm not willing to spend five years on a relationship only to find out it's not going anywhere. This two-year path is incredibly efficient. Within one year, you get a clear answer: either you're building a future together, or you've learned you're not compatible and can both move on without regret. It’s a win-win."

3. It Fosters True Partnership from Day One.

"When you have a shared timeline and goal, you stop just 'hanging out' and start actively building a life together. You're forced to have the important conversations about finances, family, and future plans early on. It turns dating from a casual activity into a collaborative project, which builds a much stronger foundation for marriage."

4. The Timeline Itself Creates Security, Not Pressure.

"Some might think a timeline is unromantic, but the real romance is in the commitment. Knowing that the person you're with is just as serious as you are about building a future creates an incredible sense of security and trust. The uncertainty is what causes anxiety. The certainty of a shared plan is what allows you to relax and truly be yourself."

In short, you can summarize it like this:

"My philosophy is about being intentional, not indefinite. It’s two years of focused effort for a lifetime of partnership. It replaces uncertainty with clarity and respects everyone's time."